Saturday, June 6, 2009

1. I make it a rule never to boldly go where no man has gone
2. Funny, I don't remember collecting $2oo as I went past go
3. Every day is a new opportunity to screw things up.
4. Life IS worth living! In fact, that's the only way it can be done!
5. If your life resembles a garbage dump,
just think of it as an environmentally-sound landfill.
6. I had a kit and caboodle...until I misplaced the caboodle.
7. Fortunately, growing up has its own compensations,
although I can't think of any.
8. Thanks to Prozac my head is in a better place where
it can't do any harm.
9. If opportunity knocks, it's probably selling something.
10. Nobody said life was fair or easy, but it comes
with a lifetime guarantee.
Count Sneaky


Fran Hill said...

Love them. I am taking up Number 3 as my daily mantra. No good having unrealistic expectations, after all.

Sandi McBride said...

You left out the one about how you live in your own little world..but it's okay, they all know you
loved this!
BatGirl and Strutz, the winsome duo, were last seen boarding a train in Philly headed for any airport they can find

alantru said...

Thank you, Count.

These are marvelous. I'm printing this page off and sticking it on my wall.

Nothing Profound said...

I'm glad you revisited, so I got a chance to see these Count Sneakyisms.
Witty effusions of a refined gentleman. I love all aphorisms, and these are delightful. In the near or far future I'll be adding more to my collection. Thanks for the encouragement and interest.

Pinhole said...

I remember someone asking once, "What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?"

Wish I could take credit for that one.

Great Sneakyisms. Keep up the recovery.

LLnL said...

Funny and wise.