Saturday, June 13, 2009

Senior Moments

"Stop yelling, 'DAMAGE REPORT!', every time the grand kids leave!"
"Of course it's not your size, Maude. They don't make your size!"
"You're down to your last marbles, Earl. Don't push it!"
"It's fat-free, no cholesterol, and no calories. Don't ask what it is!"
"My daddy says that when he was a boy, you were a young man.
Is that true, Grandpa?"
"Same old same old, Earl. But, I think you will be intrigued
by its piquant bouquet and slightly fruity taste!"
"I've done the big five oh! I've done the big six oh! Now, I'm working
on the big OH NO!
"Dinner will be ready shortly. There's just enough time to mow
the lawn; trim the hedges; carry out the trash; and fix that leaky faucet."
"No, Maude, I am not going to stop and ask for directions...what
difference does it make WHERE we're going!"
Count Sneaky


Anonymous said...

Although I seldom comment I rarely miss reading your posts. I usually get a chuckle. Love your sense of humor.

Fran Hill said...

'You're down to your last marbles, Earl.' Good one! Funny post.

LLnL said...

: ) I enjoyed those. I think my favorite is dinner will be ready soon. I am sometimes guilty of that. Not when I'm cooking but when I warn things up I guess I want to stay busy and leftovers can come out a little crispy. I thought 5 minutes was plenty of time to get things done.

Nothing Profound said...

Wonderful! More whimsy with the usual aplomb.

By the way: I finally posted some new aphorisms if you're interested.

Take care.

alantru said...

As always, thank you, Count.

That was wonderful.